The Last of the Wilds

I hate being angry, I hate being frustrated. I drives me, it pains me.

I can hide it and have a good time as the days pass, but at the end of it all, I feel like I just want to punch a wall.

It's a sickly feeling, stuck in my stomach. I don't know how to describe it, but the situations I am in. It's a clusterfuck. It's situations that is making me go crazy, because I don't know how to resolve it.

Honestly, the one person I could go, is now part of the problem. I keep every day off my shoulder, hoping I can just get by. Yet it beats me down, and I don't know how to get back up.

It will resolve itself eventually, yet I want to resolve it with the least scars as possible. It would be nice.

Even Alice in Wonderland would be shaking her head to how fucked up this story is...

I can't be driven by anger. I'm too much of a caring person to live by that fact. Yet its taking over me.

But don't think this is something thats preaching like "Oh gawd someone help me I can't hold on any longer"

no. im strong. its just difficult. a lot of people know these situations and how hard it is to get out of. so i just keep going. i reason. i rationalize. i listen. i learn. i resolve it.

its because i have a heart, though it may be cold. it still beats. one day it will warm up again. but that day is lost in the fog at the moment. so its just a matter of striving forward. keeping strong.

because even the people you thought were close to you can be the furthest away sometimes...

sad.