So I lied about me trying to post everyday, but I will try to get better at this since I am kinda new to blogging. But that's not the point of this post, right now its more of writing what I am feeling right now because I am frustrated and this is the only way I can get it out.
I thought I was over and done with the whole getting hurt by someone, at least in high school. I thought I was going to get through the year with nothing to be hindered by, but of course somehow this pain has returned. Sure I do like someone but I wasn't going to act on it or anything, that feeling was just there. Just there for me to look at it and ponder of what could be but never will. (I do a lot of pondering, I guess I'm a deep thinker.) Anywho, yes as I was saying, I thought this type of pain was gone for awhile yet of course someone comes in under the radar and catches me off guard and there I am on the sidelines dumbfounded by what has just happened. I guess it's my fault for not acting on it as its my nature. My nature is being cautious and taking one step at a time, tiptoeing forward. Yet somehow I trip land flat on my face, and this is where I am now, on the ground just lying there.....not wanting to get up right now as this is the 3rd time this has happened to me.
I guess I can only say that I need to change my nature and stop hiding behind the curtains and go for it when I really want to because I'm always going to shoot myself in the foot if I don't.
I could go on into what I would do for that person, why I care about that person, but sadly I already threw that thought away and am now trying to just forget, because that's all anyone can do. And I realize I am not the only one out there going through this, but God, I wish I was because no nice guy deserves something like this, especially happenes again to them.
All I can say is: Nice guys finish last.
So I vented a little bit, I just have to push foward, and maybe that's completely forgetting who she is and only remember that she is only a friend and the rest is invisible.
"Screw my life
But not my happiness
For one without happiness
Loses their sense of forgiveness"
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Sadly, what you say is true. Girls tend to be insanely clueless when it comes to the nice guys approaching them, (I know from experience). We're so caught up in the rush of life, that we sometimes don't see the truth under all of the hectic emotions that tend to be fake and pointless. Just crash right into life; It's too short to tiptoe, even if that is what you have been doing for all of your life. I wish you the best in your pursuit of everything... It's unfair how things work out.
ReplyDelete"Life's a Bitch. If it were a slut, it'd be easy."
:]